Antes de salir (Before I go)...kinda

I feel the need to post two blog entries. 

The first will detail the amazing opportunities I have had these last couple months to help me prepare for this next adventure in my life. The second will be more about Bolivia—because, yes, I have made it!

This preparation began before I even was invited to serve in Andahuaylillas, Peru. Jesuit Volunteer Corps (JVC) emphasizes the process of discernment in such a way that before applicants even know if they are placed, they are preparing their hearts and truly digging within themselves to discern if serving for two years abroad is what they feel called to do/want to do. I really appreciated this preparation because then, upon receiving the invitation to serve in Peru, I had already sat with, mulled over, meditated on the idea of leaving home for two years to live in solidarity with a community that I did not know.

I assume you already know how I felt, but you know what they say about assume…so let me tell you. I welcomed this completely terrifying, exciting, challenging, and life-ruining opportunity. (Just a note: it will be life-ruining, as JVC loves to say; because it will change the way I look at consumerism, community, social justice and much more, as I know it). My family has reminded me in recent weeks--as the anxiety of leaving heightened--that an international, volunteer experience, such as serving with JVC, has been on my heart for years.

However, I did not just jump onto a plane with a ready heart to serve and learn and grow. There have been two, BIG, formidable experiences, one in May and the other in July, that helped remind me of what I am entering into and why I chose to do it in the first place.

Let’s go back to May. I attended a retreat/conference in Spokane, Washington with the Krista Foundation for Global Citizenship [check out the link on the side of my blog!]. At this retreat, we talked about roots. We applied this concept to volunteer work and listened to previous volunteers tell their stories of finding their roots in new places, but, also, ways in which they were uprooted.

I find myself thinking about roots, where I find them, how I feel when I am not rooted. A lot of my thoughts revolved around my family, friends, and home. So, naturally, since none of those three are with me during my time of service, I will continue to sit with this idea of "roots" in a foreign place.  

The weekend also included prayer, singing, workshops, and community building which were all impactful, but as I sit as a computer in Bolivia writing this, I can think of something very specific which I still carry with me to today. It is the message in an article called, "Staying for Tea" by Aaron Ausland comes to mind. which basically talks about the importance of staying present in the community I serve--to listen, to chat, to learn. 

I left that weekend feeling supported and grounded. I felt a part of a bigger whole, kind of like a new family; a group of people who know from experience what I am about to enter into with JVC.

After my positive experience with the Krista Foundation, I was even more excited for my JVC orientation in July. I traveled to Boston College in Massachusetts and stayed two weeks for an orientation with all of the other JVC international volunteers, as well as, the volunteers with Rostro de Cristo. What an inspiring group of people! The two weeks were packed with making friends and learning so much information. I could write a book about what we learned (or fill a 3 in. 3 ring binder ;) )  but there are a couple key points that made an impression on my heart and that I will mention. Just to note, many of the themes are similar to that which we discussed at the Krista Foundation, which helped further etch them into my mind and onto my heart. 

The first is the concept of what kind of volunteer I am. I am not a entering into these communities as a “savior” or as a “helper.” For these constructs can hinder more than help communities. I am entering this experience as a servant, in a position of learning or apprenticeship. I know that I have much more to learn than to teach, but even so I am hoping to not be passive in this experience. For the strength I carry is accompaniment. I may not be able to “fix” or even help—which seems to be ingrained in American youth when entering other countries. Instead, I hope to accompany others, to be present with others, during moments of pain and, even, celebrations of joy.

Henri Nouwen writes, “Those who offer us comfort and consolation by being and staying with us in moments of illness, mental anguish, or spiritual darkness often grow as close to us as those with whom we have biological ties. They show their solidarity with us by willingly entering the dark, uncharted spaces of our lives.” I do not think myself already able to do this, rather I hope to grow and learn what it means to truly sit with someone, accompany someone in their pain. In essence, I hope to learn to be truly compassionate, which Nouwen describes as a “full immersion in the condition of being human.” 

Obviously, there is so much more, but I have two years to go deeper into what have already mentioned and into what I have failed to include in this entry. 

Basically, I had a summer full of new friends, lots of fun, and conversations that will keep me thinking throughout my time here in Bolivia and my two years in Peru.